I was a bit hesitant at first about writing this article on DADS. Because usually the best things in life are the ones hardest to share in words. And DADS are high up among the top things on this “Best Things in Life” list. With Father’s Day just finished this weekend, I took a second to think about the newest- and most awesome- dad I know- my husband-to-be. And so I dedicate this to him and to all the dads and future dads out there who make our lives more stressful, annoying, complicated, beautiful, magic, filled with kids and joy and who love us unconditionally.
Becoming a mom is amazing and hard and exciting and scary and unique, all at the same time. And there will always be moments when we will feel overwhelmed, and insecure, and we will doubt ourselves whether what we do is good and think about how we could do more and be more. It’s always about the MORE. And that’s when we find out we were lucky in choosing our life partner and our children’s dads. I, for one, was the luckiest one. (I know you all say that and that’s even the beauty of it- that we all feel our husband is the best one there could be). It’s the hard times that make dads prove to be real men. Prove to be loyal husbands, and loving dads. And in those times, you discover things about them that you never knew existed.
I know people who plan babies just like they plan holidays. On the calendar, with the exact year and month, and then maybe postpone it some more cause the house needs to be renovated, and the car broke down, and maybe they’re still hoping to get that promotion at work. And besides that, there’s the loss of freedom and free time, and the death of romance, and there’s no more sex or nights out or exotic holidays, things you can never get back, and anyways -you’re too young now. And your husband will suddenly become just the father of your child and you will be the mother. Well, these people are missing out on everything beautiful in this life. The spontaneity, the fun, the surprise, THE MEANING of life. My husband used to say to me every time how life is best when you just let it happen. When you let yourself be surprised by it. And go with the flow. Being a parent doesn’t affect your relationship or your marriage if you don’t let it. On the contrary, it spices it up, gives it meaning and makes it even more fun and daring. Children don’t care that you don’t live in the biggest 2-floor villa in Malibu, or that they don’t go to sleep in a designer-decorated nursery or that you don’t walk them in the latest 2,000$ stroller. All that matters is the love you have to give. And that’s one of the reasons I am so thankful to my husband for teaching me.
Since the day Sasha was born, you have done every bottle with me, changed diapers, washed butts, got the best burps, rocked him to sleep, shushhed him to sleep, sang him to sleep, you were there for every doctor visit, night shift, park stroll, crisis, midnight breastfeeding, teething, pooing, and woke up to keep me company every night. All the coffee we had together in the past 7 months would have never been enough without your patience and strength. So thank you. Thank you for doing the dishes at 6 am so that I have enough space to refill them by noon, thank you for taking out the garbage bags filled with poo every single time, thank you for the midnight jokes, for your humor in difficult times, for your late night car rides, for a shoulder to cry on, and for letting me complain every single time and never getting annoyed by it. It makes me so happy to see so much of you in his eyes and his stubborn and powerful personality, and I will always be proud for creating another mini-you that will one day turn into the man you are now.
We love you Chris, endlessly, forever, to the sky and back. And thank you for this gift sleeping right here next to me and for making me not having to plan every day ahead phew.
Here’s to the dads who bring us water and midnight food platters while we’re breastfeeding, and who miss football games so they can be there for bath time; who keep us company for every single thing we have to do and usually do alone during the day, but just so you know, the simple fact you’re there beside us makes it all better. Long live these heroes called DADS who put up with our hormonal, monster-ish side and who gain 20 pounds while we are pregnant cause you put up with our cravings and join us. Cheers to you all.
We love you dads everywhere, and you should never forget the huge role you play in our mental health and well-being, I mean if you thought taking us out on a date last Friday night was a great idea, please consider it again every damn weekend because that’s what we still keep those heels in our closet for.