Women’s Day Special: A Motherhood Journey, Self-Love, and Real Talk by Hailey from Our Happy Mess

Motherhood, well there ain’t no hood like motherhood…Right? It changes you instantly. Right from conception you start taking care of and loving and nurturing something you have never met or held yet.  Motherhood has taught me to be selfless, yet look after myself at the same time. Three kids in and I have learnt to just let the house go and have fun. That doesn’t mean I don’t get overwhelmed by the mess.  I am 6 years into my motherhood journey and yes, I lost myself along the way, covered in vomit and nappies and sleepless nights and yet here I am now, more myself than ever before, stronger and more likely to say no to things that don’t make my heart sing with joy.

I was never in my mind skinny enough before children. I was a size 6, it was silly and in my head I hated my stretch marks – you name it, I probably had an issue with it.
I wasn’t sure how I would go with my body changing and growing again. I have been lucky it hasn’t changed drastically and now I love it.. it has carried and birthed 3 beautiful babies.

Each stretch mark and my C-section scar remind me of a journey we took together. A journey where we never met but I loved you more than I could imagine. Each mark is my journey to motherhood.

Each body is beautiful and I think we as mothers have a very important message for our children. If we don’t love our bodies, how can we tell our children to do it? We have to practice what we preach. Own our words with actions.

I love that my children take me back to my own childhood. Everything is magic and we get to live that magic again through our children.

Motherhood isn’t always glam despite what our Insta feeds may say.. it isn’t all cute outfits and coffee dates. Motherhood is late nights, early mornings and multiple wakes up in between. It’s busting to wee but you are trapped under a sleeping baby so you stay where you are. It’s rushing to school and kindy, making lunches and usually doing it covered in vomit which is not your own. It is wiping bums, changing nappies and fixing scraped knees.. it’s covering a mosquito bite in a bandaid because well your child won that battle. It’s having to tell your kids off to make sure they learn right from wrong. It’s teaching kindness and showing love. It’s a responsibility like no other…but yes it’s even more than all that.. its deeper than that.. it is wearing your heart on your sleeve and knowing you have done your best yet still questioning if you could have done more, it’s the mum guilt. Its putting your child first before yourself but trying not to lose yourself in the process. Explaining motherhood is impossible.

It’s a journey.. it’s a ride, it’s forever learning and growing as your children learn and grow. With everything I do, I just hope when they are grown they still call me for coffee dates and want to sleep over with their children and go on holidays with us. Then I’ll feel I did alright.. until then I guess I won’t know… I’ll just keep making it up as I go and loving them lots on the way.

Motherhood is hard and can be so lonely at times. You need to find your tribe of women who support you and have your back, through your wins and loses. A bunch of women cheering you on no matter what. I am lucky I have that. It has helped me be a better mom and person.

Women seem to be so hard on each other, so judgemental. That needs to stop. Build women up 💪🏽 cheer them on.. back them up no matter what.

Happy International Women’s Day to all Mom Warriors!

Words by Hailey, @our.happy.mess

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